So I was sitting in my Evolution class today and I got to thinking about something that we had gone over in our last class. We were going over a concept and it basically meant religion and evolution couldn't be taught together. This I thought was totally stupid and a load of bull. There was a graphic shown on the PowerPoint that compared two sides of the argument. One side was the religious side, and the other was the scientific side. The religious side was showing this certain thing and if you had this foundation it would support this, this and this. On that side, it said the Bible supports blah blah blah and homosexual behavior was included. This infuriated me and then I thought about all of this I am now going to tell you.
I got to thinking about religion and it's greatest conflict right now between religion and homosexuality/marriage equality for LGBTs. I know this might get a little repetitive after a while talking about marriage equality and gay rights but it is something that is becoming more important to me as days go by.
A lot of people are saying that LGBT persons shouldn't be able to marry because it will increase taxes and expenses, that heterosexuals will be influenced or will be effected, it's against the church and the Bible. I don't think that marriage equality will bring these concerns to light, or at least not as much as people are thinking they will be.
It might increase expenses by giving homosexual couples more liberties and more rights that heterosexual couples have, like being able to put someone on their insurance or allowing them to be in the hospital room and receive their medical information and being allowed to make medical decisions if their partner is not able to make them. Sure, those expenses may rise but I don't think as much as people are making a big deal about. But what's with "marriage equality for LGBTs will raise taxes" bullshit? I thought everyone paid taxes? Even if they were gay or straight? Why should it matter if gay people are paying taxes or straight people are paying. For the most part, everyone is going to be paying roughly the same amount or at least gay people are not going to get exceptions to paying taxes just because they are dating the same sex. That is complete ignorance if you think that will happen because it won't.
Another argument for heterosexuals who are against marriage equality is that being homosexual or getting married to the same sex is against the church. I don't think it is fair to put that restriction, or in some cases, guilt, on people. Why would someone say that it is against the church for homosexuals to get married when some of those homosexuals might not even be religious or believe in a higher power. Some of the LGBTs might not even want to get married in the church so what does it matter if it is against the church or not?
There's another thing that bothers me with the church + LGBT marriage equality. When heterosexuals get married in the church they still have to get their marriage license, which is not even a part of the church, it is a legal government issue. So why are we leaving some decisions up to the religious figures in the country and taking their opinions into highest consideration?
I don't think any of this is logical or fair. I also don't think it's fair that people who don't even know me or other LGBT women and men are telling me who I can or cannot love or marry. Would you want me to tell you that you can't work a certain job or love and marry this person because I apparently hate you like you hate LGBTs? I don't think so. So why are you telling me I can't marry this person because I love them and want to be with them for the rest of my life?
There are more people that are standing up and speaking out that they are against gay rights and against marriage equality than there are people standing up and speaking out that they want LGBTs to be able to have more rights and get married. I urge you to stand up for what you believe in (and hopefully that is for marriage equality!) and get involved and support groups that help support you and your beliefs.
...The Limping Lizard.
Monday, January 25, 2010
Monday, January 18, 2010
Standing up for what's right
I am bisexual and I have been with my girlfriend for almost a year now. I have been with guys and have not found a deep connection with them as I have with her. I knew early on that I loved her and she felt the same. Around our 6 months, we got engaged. We've become fans of the HRC (Human Rights Campain) and subscribe to emails. We follow marriage equality news all the time. We live in New York and wonder if we ever will get to marry in NY. It went to Senate a couple months ago and we were denied the right to marry. This was hugely disappointing but I wasn't surprised. There are a lot of negative people who dont support LGBTs and those voices are being heard over ours. Again, disappointing. We have to wait another year until we can fight (even harder) to have our rights granted to us that we should have had already. We're thinking about going out of state (probably Mass.) for a small ceremony and then having a reception with family and friends who couldnt attend. But hopefully when 2012 comes around, we wont have to go out of state to celebrate our life and love together. ♥
I don't think that this type of discrimination is fair. Being part of the LGBT (Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender) population, I believe it is my right to be able to marry whomever I choose. In the Constitution it says that "all men are created equal." Some chauvinistic people in America (and other parts of the world) believe that this was meant for only MEN to have every right. More people than some people think, think that the Constitution was meant to represent both female and male. Even if the first group of people were right, all men are NOT created equal since Gay men aren't allowed to get married to their partner. You know what I just said is true, don't deny it. Other views are extremely religious views. Religious leaders are saying that it is against the Bible for homosexuals to get married in the church. So what? Who says marriage has to be all religious? There are a ton of people that get married by a Judge or Justice of the Peace, not a Priest or another type of religious figure. Just because extreme Christians aren't open minded or think that LGBTs weren't considered when Jesus and/or God created men and women, doesn't mean they can suppress our right to get married (by law, not church). What ever happened to "separation between church and state?" Even if you get married in the church, you still have to get a marriage license and get it legalized by the local/state government. It is a legal thing, not a religious thing. A lot of people who get married aren't religious at all. So what does this have to do with religion?!
Although there are many organizations out there fighting against marriage equality, there is one organization fighting for those rights for LGBTs. That organization is called the HRC, or the Human Rights Campaign. These people are determined to make marriage equal among all peoples, not just straight people. Although the numbers prove that there are more people involved with the "against" crew, I believe the HRC will come out on top because determination, strength, love, heart, and faith will persevere over negativity. Maybe someday I will be a representative for the HRC and work for fighting for peoples' rights that aren't granted yet.
"If the mind keeps thinking you’ve had enough
but the heart keeps telling you don't give up
who are we to be questioning, wondering what is what?
Don't give up, through it all, just stand up"
Visit this link and view the video if you want to see what those "haters" are saying about LGBT rights and how the HRC is fighting that. If you want to donate some money to help the HRC and LGBTs, that is up to you. If you do, Thank you. If you don't, it's okay. But just keep your mind open, and view the video:
https://secure3.convio.net/hrc/site/Donation2?df_id=3780&3780.donation=form1&autologin=true&JServSessionIdr004=xu7t7oanl1.app305a
Please support!
...The Limping Lizard.
I don't think that this type of discrimination is fair. Being part of the LGBT (Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender) population, I believe it is my right to be able to marry whomever I choose. In the Constitution it says that "all men are created equal." Some chauvinistic people in America (and other parts of the world) believe that this was meant for only MEN to have every right. More people than some people think, think that the Constitution was meant to represent both female and male. Even if the first group of people were right, all men are NOT created equal since Gay men aren't allowed to get married to their partner. You know what I just said is true, don't deny it. Other views are extremely religious views. Religious leaders are saying that it is against the Bible for homosexuals to get married in the church. So what? Who says marriage has to be all religious? There are a ton of people that get married by a Judge or Justice of the Peace, not a Priest or another type of religious figure. Just because extreme Christians aren't open minded or think that LGBTs weren't considered when Jesus and/or God created men and women, doesn't mean they can suppress our right to get married (by law, not church). What ever happened to "separation between church and state?" Even if you get married in the church, you still have to get a marriage license and get it legalized by the local/state government. It is a legal thing, not a religious thing. A lot of people who get married aren't religious at all. So what does this have to do with religion?!
Although there are many organizations out there fighting against marriage equality, there is one organization fighting for those rights for LGBTs. That organization is called the HRC, or the Human Rights Campaign. These people are determined to make marriage equal among all peoples, not just straight people. Although the numbers prove that there are more people involved with the "against" crew, I believe the HRC will come out on top because determination, strength, love, heart, and faith will persevere over negativity. Maybe someday I will be a representative for the HRC and work for fighting for peoples' rights that aren't granted yet.
"If the mind keeps thinking you’ve had enough
but the heart keeps telling you don't give up
who are we to be questioning, wondering what is what?
Don't give up, through it all, just stand up"
Visit this link and view the video if you want to see what those "haters" are saying about LGBT rights and how the HRC is fighting that. If you want to donate some money to help the HRC and LGBTs, that is up to you. If you do, Thank you. If you don't, it's okay. But just keep your mind open, and view the video:
https://secure3.convio.net/hrc/site/Donation2?df_id=3780&3780.donation=form1&autologin=true&JServSessionIdr004=xu7t7oanl1.app305a
Please support!
...The Limping Lizard.
Monday, January 11, 2010
It's Been a While
Hey guys! For those of you who keep checking back regularly or semi-regularly, I'm sorry I haven't had a new post in a while. I'm slowly but surely working on it. So stay tuned for another post coming soon!
...The Limping Lizard.
...The Limping Lizard.
Wednesday, January 6, 2010
Moving on...
Since I was born I have lived in Herkimer, New York. The summer after 7th grade, my mom sold our house and bought one in Deerfield. We ended up moving a couple weeks later.
Moving out of town meant a couple things. It meant that I would leave my best friend behind. I have known her since I was born but don't really remember anything before I was like 4 years old. We got really close throughout our childhood. It was probably one of the toughest things to drive away from my best friend waving back to me.
I don't remember much of that day when I left the Herkimer house, but some things are in my memory clear as day. I remember packing the car with the last of our stuff, then getting in the front seat of the car. My mom piled a laundry basket on my lap, while another laundry basket was below my feet. Then my mom handed me the fish bowl, with fish included, for me to hold for the ride.
I remember crying so hard I could barely talk. I was sobbing that I didn't want to leave, that I didn't want to go. Through my tears and sobs, I told my best friend and her family goodbye and that I'd miss them. My mom started the car and we pulled away from the curb. We were moving away and moving on.
I pretty much cried all the way to my new home. We immediately got to unpacking and I moved into my new room. It was bare. The walls were painted a light pink from the previous owner. If any of you know me, you know that I wouldn't be able to stand staring at pink walls all day. A couple of my mom's co-workers stopped by to see if we needed any help. The art teacher and I decided to go to Lowe's and get new paint. We brought a pillow with a Robins Egg Blue type of color on it and they made the paint the same color. That same day, the day that we moved, we painted my room that blue color. It was a good experience, a fun experience, that I still remember to this day.
We have now been living in this house since then, and I'm glad for it. It's a much nicer neighborhood and we're closer to family here. My aunt and uncle are right around the corner, my grandma is 2 minutes away, and another set of aunts and uncles are 5 minutes away. I believe we are better here and my mom made the right decision to move here, even though I thought my life was ending at first.
... The Limping Lizard.
Moving out of town meant a couple things. It meant that I would leave my best friend behind. I have known her since I was born but don't really remember anything before I was like 4 years old. We got really close throughout our childhood. It was probably one of the toughest things to drive away from my best friend waving back to me.
I don't remember much of that day when I left the Herkimer house, but some things are in my memory clear as day. I remember packing the car with the last of our stuff, then getting in the front seat of the car. My mom piled a laundry basket on my lap, while another laundry basket was below my feet. Then my mom handed me the fish bowl, with fish included, for me to hold for the ride.
I remember crying so hard I could barely talk. I was sobbing that I didn't want to leave, that I didn't want to go. Through my tears and sobs, I told my best friend and her family goodbye and that I'd miss them. My mom started the car and we pulled away from the curb. We were moving away and moving on.
I pretty much cried all the way to my new home. We immediately got to unpacking and I moved into my new room. It was bare. The walls were painted a light pink from the previous owner. If any of you know me, you know that I wouldn't be able to stand staring at pink walls all day. A couple of my mom's co-workers stopped by to see if we needed any help. The art teacher and I decided to go to Lowe's and get new paint. We brought a pillow with a Robins Egg Blue type of color on it and they made the paint the same color. That same day, the day that we moved, we painted my room that blue color. It was a good experience, a fun experience, that I still remember to this day.
We have now been living in this house since then, and I'm glad for it. It's a much nicer neighborhood and we're closer to family here. My aunt and uncle are right around the corner, my grandma is 2 minutes away, and another set of aunts and uncles are 5 minutes away. I believe we are better here and my mom made the right decision to move here, even though I thought my life was ending at first.
... The Limping Lizard.
Monday, January 4, 2010
Demons, Drugs & Divorce
When I was about 7 years old, my mother and father sat me down on my bed in my room. I can't remember the exact words but they told me they were going to be separated and get a divorce and that "Daddy" wasn't going to live with us anymore. I remember that my mom and dad kept telling me it wasn't my fault and that everything will be okay.
I'm 19 now and I haven't seen my dad since I was 8. I can't remember when I found out why my parents divorced but I can tell you why. My dad was an addict. He had a problem with alcohol and drugs. Once I found this out, I made a pledge to myself to never be like my father. I never want to do drugs like he did and I never want to lose control of drinking alcohol. To this day, I still have not had more than one beer. People with alcoholism in their family have a higher chance of becoming an alcoholic themselves. I do not want to become another statistic of following that trend.
I guess my father had some demons that he couldn't bury enough to get through without "help" from drugs or alcohol. Make no mistake, his decision to use tore up our family. It tore some holes within me and my mother, but it also tore some holes within his own family, my uncles and my grandparents. He hurt so many people, including himself. Sometimes I wonder if he knows the extent of what he did to everyone around him. ...?
About a year ago, I made the decision to send my dad a letter with my email address included in it. This was a huge step, I'd like to think, in the right direction. One day I got an email from my dad. I was so scared to open that email I started to cry. As the year went on, I received emails from him. Sometimes it would take him a couple days or a week to reply. However, there were some points that it would take him longer to reply to my emails. I would always reply to him right away; I wish he would do the same.
All throughout my life after the divorce, My dad would sporadically send me a card on my birthday or the nearest holiday. Sometimes I believe he would forget my birthday but some years he would remember. I don't know why this was but sometimes it would upset me, other times I was just like "it's whatever, I'm used to it."
My mom divorced my dad because it was the right thing to do for us at the time, to get him out of our lives because we were in danger or threatened. She always doubts her decision to leave him, but as I have grown up I support her decision and I thank her for it.
As my father had, or maybe still has, his demons, I have my own. This divorce is always in the back of my mind. And every time I face any relationship with drugs or alcohol, his picture comes in the back of mind and I remember that I don't need to fit in or use those things to escape my problems.
I will always face these demons but I believe that I am a strong enough person to overcome them and move on. I don't need drugs or alcohol in my life. Too bad my father didn't realize that for himself.
...The Limping Lizard.
I'm 19 now and I haven't seen my dad since I was 8. I can't remember when I found out why my parents divorced but I can tell you why. My dad was an addict. He had a problem with alcohol and drugs. Once I found this out, I made a pledge to myself to never be like my father. I never want to do drugs like he did and I never want to lose control of drinking alcohol. To this day, I still have not had more than one beer. People with alcoholism in their family have a higher chance of becoming an alcoholic themselves. I do not want to become another statistic of following that trend.
I guess my father had some demons that he couldn't bury enough to get through without "help" from drugs or alcohol. Make no mistake, his decision to use tore up our family. It tore some holes within me and my mother, but it also tore some holes within his own family, my uncles and my grandparents. He hurt so many people, including himself. Sometimes I wonder if he knows the extent of what he did to everyone around him. ...?
About a year ago, I made the decision to send my dad a letter with my email address included in it. This was a huge step, I'd like to think, in the right direction. One day I got an email from my dad. I was so scared to open that email I started to cry. As the year went on, I received emails from him. Sometimes it would take him a couple days or a week to reply. However, there were some points that it would take him longer to reply to my emails. I would always reply to him right away; I wish he would do the same.
All throughout my life after the divorce, My dad would sporadically send me a card on my birthday or the nearest holiday. Sometimes I believe he would forget my birthday but some years he would remember. I don't know why this was but sometimes it would upset me, other times I was just like "it's whatever, I'm used to it."
My mom divorced my dad because it was the right thing to do for us at the time, to get him out of our lives because we were in danger or threatened. She always doubts her decision to leave him, but as I have grown up I support her decision and I thank her for it.
As my father had, or maybe still has, his demons, I have my own. This divorce is always in the back of my mind. And every time I face any relationship with drugs or alcohol, his picture comes in the back of mind and I remember that I don't need to fit in or use those things to escape my problems.
I will always face these demons but I believe that I am a strong enough person to overcome them and move on. I don't need drugs or alcohol in my life. Too bad my father didn't realize that for himself.
...The Limping Lizard.
Goals for 2010
2010 has started off right, with a kiss at midnight from my wonderful girlfriend. I know that 2010 will bring many possibilities and I will try to take every one of those realistic possibilities. As people set their "New Years Resolutions" I am setting a couple goals to achieve throughout the year instead of just one resolution. Someone's goals or resolutions might not be realistic to their life, but I am trying my hardest to set goals for myself that I can actually accomplish. Thing brings me to a fork in the road.
One way passed the fork is the path of total concentration and determination. This is the path that at the end of it, I would reach all my goals and am able to cross them off my list. This is obviously ideal, and I hope reasonable.
The other fork is the path of the rocky road. And no, it's not a path where you can eat Rocky Road ice cream, but it's the path where I struggle through achieving those goals I have set for myself. This would be a disappointing path, and also might be a little longer than the first path.
My goals for the year of 2010:
...The Limping Lizard.
One way passed the fork is the path of total concentration and determination. This is the path that at the end of it, I would reach all my goals and am able to cross them off my list. This is obviously ideal, and I hope reasonable.
The other fork is the path of the rocky road. And no, it's not a path where you can eat Rocky Road ice cream, but it's the path where I struggle through achieving those goals I have set for myself. This would be a disappointing path, and also might be a little longer than the first path.
My goals for the year of 2010:
- I want to get a dog. My ideal dog would be a Norwich terrier who's loving, happy, and energetic. I want a dog that I can have a special bond with and the dog would make me smile every time I walked through the door when I got home. I want to save up enough money to afford buying a dog, either from a shelter or from somewhere else.
- I want to pay off my mom's notebook. She keeps track of the money I owe her from my car insurance, cell phone bill, etc. I want to pay her off enough that there is only close to $100 left on it after I give my mom the last group of money. This may take all year, but I think with enough managing, I can do it.
- To get nothing lower than a B- in all of my classes in the Spring 2010 semester. In the past, I have disappointed myself, and I'm sure others, and I don't want to be disappointing myself with my grades again. I lost some of my scholarship towards college due to some poor grades and I'm determined to get that money back.
- And lastly, I want to give my girlfriend a romantic date for our one year anniversary. I can't disclose what I would do for her specifically but you can count on it being great. This has been my longest relationship and it's been hers too. One year together marks an amazing accomplishment in itself. It is a special day that deserves to be celebrated.
...The Limping Lizard.
Coming Out to Be Myself
One of the most real struggles I've experienced is the struggle with my sexuality.
It seemed to be that since I was a young teenager I have always thought that girls were pretty and I couldn't help but to sometimes look and be interested. When I was around 10 or 11 years old, I experimented with one of my best friends, a girl*, who was my neighbor. Of course, being young, I didn't think anything of it and thought it was just a game.
When I got a little older and was in high school I had a friend* that was gay. This friend and I became really close and were best friends. One day when we were hanging out, we suddenly kissed. This was unexpected for the both of us but somehow it was unstoppable. I was so scared and somewhat reluctant to continue a further relationship than being just friends. Inevitably, the relationship stayed just friends. This got me to thinking something was different about me; I started figuring it wasn't just a game this time. I became more interested in girls.
I was scared and confused for a couple months and was afraid of what people thought if I liked girls, along with liking boys. I struggled with my sexual orientation, but I came to a realization that I couldn't hide who I was and had to be myself. To my closest friends and family, this no longer became a secret of mine that I was keeping. Much to my surprise, a lot of people, including my mom, were accepting of me and who I was. This was a load of my chest and it made me think that since these people in my life were accepting, that other people would accept me too. A lot of people were accepting but I feel I grew apart from some of my friends because they didn't like that I liked girls. This was disappointing and somewhat hurtful but I learned that everyone might not have the same opinions.
Although some people aren't accepting of Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgendered people, some people are really open minded and can stand by you for support. I have some lucky people in my life that do just that. I am grateful for those people. I am also grateful for those people who are against LGBT people, because without you there wouldn't be a fight or a struggle. Without ,the fight to gain rights for LGBTs wouldn't be so rewarding. Some day it will happen where LGBTs will be considered equal and have just as many rights as heterosexual people.
That is my coming out story and I encourage everyone to come out of the closet and be yourself. If you are struggling with your sexuality, don't be afraid of who you really are and follow your heart. If you are in the closet as a quiet person who only sings in the shower, break out of that mold and join your school chorus or sing on a street corner. Come out and be yourself...
...The Limping Lizard.
It seemed to be that since I was a young teenager I have always thought that girls were pretty and I couldn't help but to sometimes look and be interested. When I was around 10 or 11 years old, I experimented with one of my best friends, a girl*, who was my neighbor. Of course, being young, I didn't think anything of it and thought it was just a game.
When I got a little older and was in high school I had a friend* that was gay. This friend and I became really close and were best friends. One day when we were hanging out, we suddenly kissed. This was unexpected for the both of us but somehow it was unstoppable. I was so scared and somewhat reluctant to continue a further relationship than being just friends. Inevitably, the relationship stayed just friends. This got me to thinking something was different about me; I started figuring it wasn't just a game this time. I became more interested in girls.
I was scared and confused for a couple months and was afraid of what people thought if I liked girls, along with liking boys. I struggled with my sexual orientation, but I came to a realization that I couldn't hide who I was and had to be myself. To my closest friends and family, this no longer became a secret of mine that I was keeping. Much to my surprise, a lot of people, including my mom, were accepting of me and who I was. This was a load of my chest and it made me think that since these people in my life were accepting, that other people would accept me too. A lot of people were accepting but I feel I grew apart from some of my friends because they didn't like that I liked girls. This was disappointing and somewhat hurtful but I learned that everyone might not have the same opinions.
Although some people aren't accepting of Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgendered people, some people are really open minded and can stand by you for support. I have some lucky people in my life that do just that. I am grateful for those people. I am also grateful for those people who are against LGBT people, because without you there wouldn't be a fight or a struggle. Without ,the fight to gain rights for LGBTs wouldn't be so rewarding. Some day it will happen where LGBTs will be considered equal and have just as many rights as heterosexual people.
That is my coming out story and I encourage everyone to come out of the closet and be yourself. If you are struggling with your sexuality, don't be afraid of who you really are and follow your heart. If you are in the closet as a quiet person who only sings in the shower, break out of that mold and join your school chorus or sing on a street corner. Come out and be yourself...
...The Limping Lizard.
Getting to Know the Limping Lizard
I want to be known as The Limping Lizard as I write my blogs. I know it might not be the most attractive name, but I thought the name showed the struggles that I have had throughout my life.
My parents divorced when I was young and I haven't seen my father since pretty much around that time. At this point, being very young, I thought nothing could get worse.
As a kid, I felt like I needed to rebel and disrespect my mom all the time. I ended up being grounded a lot.
Throughout school, I struggled with myself and the need to fit in came into my mind a lot. Sports allowed me to become more disciplined and helped me fit in a little. Even with sports to rely on, I still felt the need to be the popular kid who everyone liked. I thought I did pretty well with that, but I can't really tell anymore. I guess it was for the people in high school to judge. But high school is over now.
I have lost people close to me, whether through death or through growing apart. I miss those people who have left the living Earth and have moved on to a more peaceful place. I also miss those people who aren't in my life anymore because we have grown apart. Some people I have just lost touch with, others I haven't talked to in months because of fights and stopped talking. This has been hard, some recent wounds and some old ones. Some will never heal but a couple have some time to grow a new, harder skin.
Those are just some of the struggles I've had since I was a kid. I'm sure more will be talked about, and more in detail. There was just a little taste of what my life has been like as...
...The Limping Lizard.
My parents divorced when I was young and I haven't seen my father since pretty much around that time. At this point, being very young, I thought nothing could get worse.
As a kid, I felt like I needed to rebel and disrespect my mom all the time. I ended up being grounded a lot.
Throughout school, I struggled with myself and the need to fit in came into my mind a lot. Sports allowed me to become more disciplined and helped me fit in a little. Even with sports to rely on, I still felt the need to be the popular kid who everyone liked. I thought I did pretty well with that, but I can't really tell anymore. I guess it was for the people in high school to judge. But high school is over now.
I have lost people close to me, whether through death or through growing apart. I miss those people who have left the living Earth and have moved on to a more peaceful place. I also miss those people who aren't in my life anymore because we have grown apart. Some people I have just lost touch with, others I haven't talked to in months because of fights and stopped talking. This has been hard, some recent wounds and some old ones. Some will never heal but a couple have some time to grow a new, harder skin.
Those are just some of the struggles I've had since I was a kid. I'm sure more will be talked about, and more in detail. There was just a little taste of what my life has been like as...
...The Limping Lizard.
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